It’s got to be hard when you’re the voice behind one of videogamings most gritty and iconic characters. David Hayter, voice actor and scriptwriter extroidanaire, has been letting audience members at the Anime Expo in California know about the ups and downs of working with Metal Gear Solid mastermind, Hideo Kojima.

While Hayter had a lot of praise about Kojima’s writing style, which he says has taught him many things about scriptwriting, he did admit to having a number of grievances about possible suicide in MGS4.

“I begged them to change it, but I think it’s still in the final game. I didn’t buy it at all. I think it’s weak for Snake to be killing other people and then not be able to kill himself when it’s time. If he knows it’s time, then it’s time,” Hayter commented.

Hayter also revealed that it isn’t the first time he has had issues with the scripting, citing a scene towards the end of Metal Gear Solid that he couldnt help but read as needlessly homoerotic. He said, “It’s a delicate thing to discuss love blooming on the battlefield with Otacon. It felt like it was written to be romantic. It was just humiliating.” However, he went on to reassure the audience that these kind of issues did decrease as the series progressed, alot with his increasing power to just say no to some of Mr. Kojima’s writing.

[See also: Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots gallery]